Home Fun Pages Funny eCards Games Tests Magic Astrology
  



The Jokes
  Random Joke
  New Jokes
  All-time best
  Short Jokes
  Dictionary
Jokes Finder
Rating:

Ordered by:

Category:
Search by key words:



Follow us on Twitter

Joke: Andy Rooney Quotes


[Cat.: Miscelaneous ] [Clasif.:a] [ Calif.: 3.5]

Andy Rooney Quotes:

Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.

I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain.

I am in shape. Round's a shape!

Ever wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?

Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster is a maniac.

The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they are okay, then it's you.

Future historians will be able to study at the Gerald Ford Library; the Jimmy Carter Library; the Ronald Reagan Library and the Bill Clinton Adult Bookstore.


(3.5 stars, 75 votes)
 

Random Joke
    Related Content:
More Miscelaneous Jokes
SHORT JOKES: Miscelaneous
FUNNY PICS AND CARTOONS: Miscelaneous
More jokes rated a (clean / for children)
 
 
 
     

Home  Fun Pages  Funny Cards  Tests  Magic  Warp It  Astrology  Privacy  Contact

2000-2014 The-Jokes.com - All rights reserved