There was a teenage boy who worked in the produce section of the local market. A man came in and asked to buy half a head of lettuce. The boy said he would go ask his manager about the matter. So he walked into the back and said,
"There's some jerk out there that wants to buy only a half a head of lettuce."
As he was finishing saying this he turned around to find the man standing right behind him, so he added,
"and this here gentleman wants to buy the other half..."
The manager Okayed the deal and the man went on his way. Later the manager called on the boy and said,
"You almost got yourself in a lot of trouble earlier, but I must say I was impressed with the way you got yourself out of it. You think on your feet and we like that around here. Where are you from son?"
The boy replied, "Canada, Sir."
"Oh really? Why did you leave Canada?" asked the manager.
The boy replied, "They're all just up-tight homely women and hockey players up there."
"Really," replied the manager, "My wife is from Canada!"
The boy replied, "No kidding! What team did she play for?"